Thursday, October 7, 2010

Who has time?

Stopping time for 24 hours.
Ahhh... the very thought is almost too much to handle. And is also a writing prompt idea from Mama Kat's writing workshop on her blog site . An actual one from this week. (See My 18 month old knows how to change diapers for full details on this mishap.)

What could I accomplish?
Well, there's always the huge mound of laundry, leading to the bag of unmatched socks I haven't gotten to, also leading to the small hamper filled with folded clothes from the last laundry day that I can't put away without small people following me to undo what I have just done.
The hand prints on the bathroom door, small smudges of mac n' cheese or peanut butter or spaghetti sauce.
How about Vacuuming? Can't do it while Kendyl is awake, she's as terrified of that machine as our dogs used to be... screaming and curling up in the corner is not conducive to getting the floor clean. And if I try while she's napping... well, that's an easy one to figure out.
The toilets could use a good scrubbing. If I do it in front of them, it's all I can do to keep curious hands from fondling the toilet brush or grabbing at chemicals.
There's a weird, finely ground dust that seeps in on my windowsills.
I'd love to soak the hard plastic toys in some bleach, especially after the kids have been so sick. The stuffed animals can go in the laundry too.
I need to go to my mothers and upload some more pictures from the digital camera, particularly the cool sleeping shots I finally got of Tyler while he was sleeping and totally conked out on Tylenol with codeine. Fully sprawled with open mouth snoring.... sweet.
My mother taught me to do the corners and baseboards. My mother is not allowed at my house right now. Who has time to do corners and baseboards, minus Mrs. Perfect, you bitch. But enough about my mother and my own insecurity.
And after the dishes, and cleaning the grease from my oven hood, and throwing the leftovers from Methuselah out of my fridge... I'd love to watch a movie, 10,000 BC is on my DVR right now. All 5 seasons of Weeds on Showtime is on the "on demand". All I've used "on demand" for lately is the same episode of Blue's Clues 20 times in a damn row.
Having sex in my own bed. That would be uber-nice. The last couple times has been in the livingroom, amongst the Cherrios, being how the bed has been taken over by small, sick children. Technically, better on the back than the pillowtop, but still, where's the romance?
Writing this blog without Tyler on my lap, trying desperately to add semi-colons. I have not used a semi-colon more than a handful of times in over 20 years of writing, I don't need them separating each one of my words into two pieces. And, I don't know what F12 does, so stop trying to touch it. It probably empties my entire C drive and burns the CPU to a crisp.

See, now this all sounds good. In reality, though, I would probably drink an entire bottle of Red Rock, eat chocolate that I didn't have to share, and then spend the remaining 23 hours sleeping with a damp towel across my face.

Anyone want to watch my kids for 24 hours?


At October 7, 2010 at 1:18 PM , Blogger Liz said...

I think you should scrap half of the "chores" and add more fun stuff to your To Do List!

At October 9, 2010 at 6:23 AM , Anonymous Jennifer Ozak said...

I you live closer I'd swap, say, 2-3 hours, but 24? Sorry, sister. That's why I didn't have a dozen children myself. 2 toddlers is enough!


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